Questallia

When I was a kid, I remember being fascinated by books. I was able to read 8-10 hours in a row, stopping only for physiological needs, then coming back to my book, eager to go through the story, to see what was next. I became part of the story, I was in the book, impersonating the character I liked most, feeling his emotions, speaking his words and thinking his thoughts.
When I grew up, the books giving me that feeling became very rare, maybe because of all the daily responsibilities and happenings, which made my focus on reading rather difficult and loose.

Recently, I had the occasion to experience that childhood kind of reading again, when I came across a fascinating story, written in such a way that it made me almost not being able to stop reading. I’m talking about Ken Wilber’s book, Grace and Grit, Spirituality and Healing in the Life and Death of Treya Killam Wilber. Ken Wilber is an American philosopher whose main work is to develop an “integral theory if consciousness”. Ken Wilber’s work has been translated in more than 20 countries. Grace and Grit is the story of a five-years fight of Ken and Treya with her breast cancer and their journey towards spiritual healing. The story is so touching that it made me even burst into tears several times, although I don’t usually do that. It alternates two points of view, two voices: one is the voice of Ken, the caregiver and the other one is Treya’s voice, the ill. The author does not make this clear from the very beginning, but as you read, you come to realize very soon that the same events are related from the two perspectives.

Besides the love story, Grace and Grit offers a support for caregivers, as they can easily identify with the character Ken, thus being reassured that they are listened to and they are understood. In some paragraphs, Ken specifically tackles his ups and downs, his feelings about getting rid of the burden, about quitting, giving up everything, followed by getting back to the love and understanding for his wife, Treya, leaving behind his career or everything else.

The story has also an informative side, as the two protagonists experiment a number of New Age ideas and practices. As a scientist and researcher and wanting to help Treya as much as he can, Ken puts together a list of alternative treatments to be researched, out of which they experimented a lot until the final scene of the story. There is also a list of different cultures and the meanings or interpretations they would assign to cancer: Christian, New Age, Medical, Karma, Psychological, Gnostic, Existential, Holistic, Magical, Buddhist, and Scientific.

The end is dramatic, with Treya’s death and the reaction of her beloved ones, with Ken’s spiritual enlightening and his promise that he will always find her. It is a truly motivating book, not only for the diseased and caregivers but for other people as well, it is a book that you don’t forget that easily.