Questallia

When you say “I have lots of friends” or “I have a lot of connections”, did it ever occur to you what is the reason you have so many connections? Why do those people keep contact with you?

I wanted to find out and I did an experiment: for two months, I did not call anybody (except my family, as they would not understand such experiments) and I waited to see how many of them would call me, just to see how I am, just to say “hello, I wanted to hear your voice”. During the experiment, I was not employed and I did not start any major project that may have attracted people to participate.

With nothing to offer and hidden in my house, I had a very big surprise: during the two months, only two persons called me to see how I am. Two!

When I used to work as marketing manager for a big company, I received such phone calls every day, from many people, just wondering “how are you, my dear?”, but in reality chasing my willingness to give them some projects to work.

When I used to take initiative and call people, they would respond gladly, the connection would be maintained. When I took no initiative, then I found out that very few people care about the others. Sometimes, even what seemed to be a 10 years friendship faded away facing my decision of not keeping those contacts anymore. When I remember the times when my friends and I were shopping for Born shoes and Coach bags in Vienna, this makes me sad a little bit, you know?

Here I am, worth three phone calls, and wiser: if you want connections, then keep them, don’t wait for people to call you, because they won’t and don’t make yourself any illusions they care for you. They don’t really care for anybody, life is rushing them too fast, so they don’t have the time to stop and think of people they like. Usually, they stop only to think of people they need. I don’t think this is good or bad, it’s just the way it is.

Then I put is the other way around: how many people do I call without wanting something, just to check they are OK? The answer is five. In this difference of three people between the called and the callers resides the disappointment.

So, how many phone calls are YOU worth?

You have the ability to radiate and revitalize your love
vibe to attract more desirable experiences. When you feel
loving, you will attract more love. Feeling good about
yourself, attracts others to you.

About the Author: Amirah, Intuitive Coach, Author, Speaker works with individuals who want to make positive life changes and
experience a deeper connection to self. Author of eBook, GET
Better LOVE and MORE of IT! Get a Free monthly newsletter at
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Email her at Amirah@soulmystic.com

As I was stumbling upon my favourite sites this morning, I came across a post in Steve Olson’s blog, called How to break a negative thought pattern. Briefly, it was about a chain of negative thoughts generated by a computer monitor which broke. The idea was that the first negative thought attracted several others, generating frustration and anger. Then, by attracting a positive thought, this was followed by others, also positive, creating a better state of mind.

One reader had this comment: “I don’t understand what’s wrong with negative thinking. Some things really suck and should treated or thought of as such.

I have a question here: if those things suck, then why should our feelings suck, too? Anger and frustration do not fix things faster, actually they do not fix things at all. Blaming also is not constructive. It doesn’t matter is we blame others or we blame ourselves, it is still a state of pure complaining, which prevents things from moving on.

What if, instead of thinking of the past, we shifted our thoughts to future: OK, this annoying thing happened; what can I do to fix it?
Let’s take for example Archimedes: what if instead of crying EVRIKA, he would have started to think: “Oh, I spilled water all over the bathroom; my wife is going to kill me!? We would have never heard about Archimedes’ law, would we?

My point here is that winners in life never complain or blame. They just think solutions and act, and this is routing fortune and happiness their way.